Day 53

 

The First Day of School

 

These commands I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk to them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

 

Deuteronomy 6:4-9

 

On the day my son started school I didn't have to worry about which bus route he was on. He was so excited he needed to register a flight plan with the F.A.A. I had never seen anyone so eager to start  kindergarten. I thought about taking him to have a genetic blood test to see if he was really mine. Maybe babies got switched at the hospital and some very intellectual parents were wondering why their son would rather stay at home and gaze into a kaleidoscope.

 

As excited as he was I could tell he had some fears as well. As much as we had told him about school it was still a great unknown for him. But the truth was it was I who was the most apprehensive as he started school.

 

I told my wife, "Now we will get to find out if we have done a good job or not." I wondered how he would handle peer pressure. At home he was never pressured to do anything wrong, not that he didn't manage to do it on his own. At home he could grow and mature at his own pace. At school there would be older kids and enticements that age and maturity had to offer. He was an only child and had been the center of attention from the time of his birth when newspapers across the country told the story of the "miracle baby." I wondered if he would learn to get along in a universe he was not the center of.

 

We prayed before he went to school. We prayed for him that he would have a good day. We prayed for his teacher. No one knew better than I how much his teacher  would need our prayers. My son could talk to you until your ears bled.

 

I was not real concerned about academics. He was very bright and knew how to read before he went to school. I knew he would do well. My wife was complaining that in a few years he would be taller than her. I told her, "What are you worried about. In a few years he will be smarter than me." He would wake up in the morning and the first thing out of his mouth was some new fact he had learned. He would open his eyes and say, "Hi Dad. Did you know panda bears aren't really bears? If I was a big eagle I would be strong enough to hold different things in each talon." He was a human Discovery Channel.

 

It was hard for me to believe he was in school. It seemed like it was just a few days before that I was amazed at his abilities when he made gurgling sounds and blew spit bubbles while shaking his rattle. I could not help but think how proud my first wife (who died when he was a 1 year old) would be of him. And I couldn't help but be thankful for the amazing job that my wife Jo had done with him. They had both been selfless when it came to him: The first risking her life that he might be born; the second giving up her freedom to be his mother.

 

Even though I had a lot of concerns about him going to school I was confident he would be okay. You see, I knew what motivated my son. I knew that more than anything he wanted to please his dad, to make me proud. He gave me that awesome power over him. I pray I have used it wisely.

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read Deuteronomy 6:4-9

 

• How deeply committed are we to be to the command of God if we expect our children to be committed to them?
• How diligent are we to be in letting our kids know what God expects of them?
• Whose responsibility is it to teach your child the ways of God?

 

Day 52

 

Tossing Cookies # 2

 

So, because you are lukewarm - neither hot or cold - I am about to spit you out of my mouth.

 

Revelation 3:16

 

 

When I started dating after my first wife died I was looking for someone not just for me but for my 3 year old son as well. I had to make sure that a person was not only up to the task of being my wife (which is a difficult job in itself) but also up to the task of being a mother. All women were not up to that task.

One young lady was very nice and we hit it off well enough. Then on Ethan's third birthday I had some friends over and she brought Ethan a baseball bat that was sized for an 8 year old and a big floor puzzle that I had difficulty putting together. She clearly didn't know a lot about kids (but I guess to be fair I suppose she could have learned).

Jo and I had started dating and she came over to the house to spend the afternoon. We had a supper of hot dogs and macaroni and cheese (okay, so I'm not a gourmet chef) and we played with Ethan until time to put him to bed. He wasn't in bed long before I heard him in his room calling for me. I rushed in to find that he was sick and had thrown up in his bed. Jo came in and offered to help clean up but I told her, "No, that's not your job. He's my son, I'll clean up the mess. If you want to help you can hold him while I clean up the mess and get fresh sheets for his bed."

So, she sat on the floor holding Ethan in her lap while I cleaned up. I had just finished cleaning up the mess and was putting sheets on the bed when I heard Ethan barfing all over Jo. It was gross and not exactly the best way to make a good impression on someone you are dating. But Jo was not fazed and it was then that I knew I had a keeper. Jo and I got married 6 months later.

God tells the church at Laodicea that because they are lukewarm that he wants to spit them out of his mouth. It is not a pleasant picture and not a pleasant thought to think that God feels that way about us. Why does God dislike lukewarm Christians so much he wants to toss his cookies? I think that if you are cold or indifferent toward Christ you are not a bad witness because people just don't associate you with Jesus. If you are lukewarm you claim Christ but show no change in your life and are a bad witness and I think that is what God finds so distasteful. So, what is your thermostat set on?

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read Revelation 3:14-22

 

• What was the church at Laodicea's main problem?
• Where the people at Laodicea as self sufficient as they thought they were?
• What does it mean to overcome? And overcome what?  

Day 51

 

The Ways of God

 

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord.

 

Isaiah 55:8

 

 

My son got ear infection after ear infection. I would get frustrated every time I called his pediatrician's office. I would tell them what was wrong but they wouldn't believe me.

I would tell the nurse, "My son has another ear infection. I need y'all to call in to the pharmacy a prescription for some antibiotics." The nurse would ask, "How do you know he has an ear infection?" And I would say, "I know because I am his father."

That was never good enough for the office personnel. I would next be asked, "Does he have a fever?" I would say, "Yes, he has a fever."

She would ask, "What is his temperature?"

I would say, "I don't know I haven't taken it."

Then she would say, "Then how do you know he has a fever?"

I would repeat, "I know because I am his father."

I knew these things. I could tell by the way he tugged his ear and the glassy look in his eyes. After his mom died it was just the two of us and we spent a lot of time together. I knew the ways of my son.

Eventually they sent us to a surgeon to have tubes put in his ears. After having a hearing test the technician told me, "Once he has tubes in his ears he will hear a lot better, develop a bigger vocabulary and talk more."

I had to ask, "Is that a good thing?" You see, I knew my son, she didn't. He already talked my ears off, I wasn't sure I was ready for more.

As for his vocabulary, it was quite developed too. When he was in kindergarten he came home from school complaining one day. "Bobby was choking me in recess so I told him, 'Bobby, you're hurting my larynx.' But he wouldn't stop."

I told him, "Ethan, Bobby doesn't know what a larynx is."

Ethan said, "I told my teacher that Bobby was hurting my larynx and she didn't do anything."

I told him, "Ethan, your teacher doesn't know what a larynx is."

Anyway, the point is I knew my son. I knew if something was wrong. I knew what he was capable of. I knew his ways.

God tells us that his thoughts and ways are not our thoughts and ways. That is bad news, not knowing the ways of God. The good news is that he doesn't keep them a secret. In fact he has written his ways down for us in his word. We can learn his ways, study his ways, meditate on his ways. With his Spirit to guide us maybe one day if someone asks us what God thinks about something we can tell them, "I know because he is my Father."

 

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read Isaiah 55:6-11

 

• Though his thoughts are higher than our thoughts is God approachable?
• What are we supposed to do with our way?
• Whose way will prevail in the end?

Day 50

 

The Groupie

 

Then Nathan said to David, "You are the man!"

 

2 Samuel 12:7

 

 

 

He was a book store groupie. He was in the store almost every day. There were others that were groupies too. Two little old ladies would come in frequently and put some new books on lay away. That wasn't so odd except that they always had something on lay away. They would find a new set of books they liked, return the books that they had on lay away and had not paid off, then put the new books on lay away. They never actually made it home with books or paid something off out of lay away, they just had this revolving lay away going. Anyway, back to this guy.

 

He was a young man in his twenties and worked at a gas station near the book store. He was not too bright but he was curious. He had a new question for me every day. He didn't buy any books he just tried to look up answers in the books and when he came to a dead end he would ask me for help. Normally I didn't mind this and I would help him find what he wanted in a book or just answer the question that he had. He genuinely wanted to know more about the Bible. Sometimes his questions would be odd or we would be real busy and he would just pester you for his entire lunch hour.

 

On one busy day he came to me and asked what the Hebrew word for water was. It was not something that I knew of the top of my  head but I knew how to find out and what book to look in. It was too complicated for me to explain to him to find on his own because as I said he wasn't too bright. (In fact I'm reasonably sure he had some sort of learning disability). As busy as we were I didn't want to take time to look it so I just gave him a flippant answer. I told him that oddly enough the Spanish word for water and the Hebrew word for water are the same they are both "agua."

 

That is completely wrong. Well agua is the Spanish word for water but it is not the Hebrew word. (The Hebrew word for water is "mayim" just in case you are wondering or doubt my ability to find these things out). I thought I had got rid of him in a harmless and amusing way.

 

The next day he was back in the store only this time he wanted a job application. I asked him what happened to his job at the gas station and he informed me he had been fired. He told me his boss had warned him that customers were complaining because he was always witnessing to them and that he needed to stop. He hadn't stopped and had witnessed to one too many people and gotten himself fired.

 

Then he said, "My dad is going to be so mad at me for getting fired." He began to cry and said, "All I want to do is make my dad proud."

 

It hit me hard. I knew that I had not made my heavenly Father proud the day before with that flippant answer to him.

 

It's not pleasant when God hits you right between the eyes. Kind David stole Uriah's wife and arranged for Uriah to be killed in battle. It is amazing the things we can do and not feel guilty.

 Eventually God does get our attention and we see the enormity of what we have done. For David it was the prophet Nathan telling him a story about the theft of a poor man's lamb and then looking David in the eye and saying, "You are the man!" For me it was a guy crying who just wanted to make his dad proud.

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read 2 Samuel 11:1 - 12:4

• Do you think David thought he had gotten away with stealing Uriah's wife?
• What was David's reaction to the story Nathan told him?
• What was David's reaction when he realized the story was about him? (2 Samuel 12:3)

 

Day 49

 

Angels

 

See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.

 

Matthew 18:10

 

Starting an argument with the guy who just handed you a job application. wouldn't seem to be the most intelligent thing to do but that is what he had done. I wasn't terribly surprised though because I remembered him from years before. It was also clear he did not remember me.

 

I first met him when he had visited a church where I was youth minister. He filled out a visitors card and I went to his apartment to visit him and invite him back to church. It was a strange visit.

 

He had a map of the world prominently displayed on a wall with push pins all over it. I asked him what the pins were for and he explained it to me. He was tracking fleet movements he said. The red pins represented the Soviet Union ships and the blue pins represented the United States ships. Exactly how he knew where the ships were, ours or theirs, I had no idea. What he planned to do with this information was not clear either. He was only getting started.

 

He had a collection of Elvis's gold records. (Elvis Presley not Elvis Costello or I might have been a little more impressed). There is nothing really strange with that, Elvis has a lot of fans. He also had an Elvis scrap book. Nothing strange with that either. He felt compelled to show me his Elvis scrap book. Now it was getting a little weird. On the last page of the scrap book was a picture of dead Elvis lying in state awaiting burial.

 

He showed me the picture and said quite seriously, "I don't think this is him. Look how pale he is. Elvis was never that pale."

 

"You could be right," I said. What I was thinking was, "Of course he's pale. It's hard to have a rosy glow when you are stone cold dead."

 

Now, about 12 years later, I was working at a Christian bookstore and he was looking for a job. I handed him the application and he said to me, "Y'all shouldn't be selling those angel figurines because they are all women. Angels aren't women; they are men."

 

First of all I had no control over what we sold other than actually ringing it up at the register. Secondly I was not too fond of the figurines myself. I don't know why the angels had to look like babes from Baywatch with wings. They were more discreetly dressed being angels, not lifeguards, but I still found it distasteful.

 

It was his comment that angels were men that got me. So I told him, "Setting aside the fact that angels are not male or female but angels, what makes you think that all angels are male?"

 

"Because they all have guy names," he said. "Gabriel, Michael and Lucifer are all guy names."

 

"Aren't there thousands of angels?" I asked. He affirmed that there were. I continued, "That's only 3 names. How do we know that all the rest of them aren't named Suzy 1, Suzy 2, and Suzy 3 and so on?"

 

He went away vowing to never work at the store unless it got rid of the women angels.

 

The word angel in Greek and Hebrew literally means messenger. They are celestial, super natural beings that are neither male nor female. They preform various tasks and one of their primary being God's messengers. This is most prominently displayed with the angel's message about the birth of Jesus. Angels will also assist God in the time of judgment and on occasion minister to God's people when they are in need. A phrase you often hear is "guardian angel." Several times  we see angels in this role. Michael is the guardian angel for Daniel (Daniel 10:13). Angels guarded Elisha from the Arameans (2 Kings 6:8-23). I guess the guys who made  the Baywatch angel figurines were just making life guardian angels.

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read Matthew 18:1-6, 10-14

 

• What is the pathway to greatness in the Kingdom of Heaven?
• What is the importance of their angels "always seeing the face of my Father in heaven"?
• What is the Father not willing to do?

 

Day 48

 

Single Parenting

 

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows is God in his holy dwelling.

 

Psalm 68:5

 

 

I have the utmost compassion for single parents. It is hard enough being a parent when there is 2 of you, let alone just 1. I know this because I experienced it.

For the first 7  months of Ethan's life his mother had been at home so I had a little training on how to take care of a baby. After Cathy died I was on my own. It is a good thing that kids are close to indestructible because I had a lot to learn.

I learned the difference between spitting up and throwing up. I was used to spitting up but when projectile vomiting started I was amazed. How could someone so small blow chunks across a room? I thought I was in a scene from The Exorcist. I kept waiting for his head to spin around. When it started pouring out the other end too I didn't know which way to point him.

I also learned about giving a baby a bath. I had some friends over one night and I excused myself from the conversation to give Ethan his bath. After his bath I brought him back into the living room and one of the women there asked me how come Ethan was so red?

I told that he had just had a hot bath. She asked, "How hot?"

I told her that the water was about as hot as I liked it. I was then informed that babies are to be bathed in warm water not hot water.

I didn't know it was too hot. He never told me it was too hot. Of course he hadn't learn to talk yet. I guess that is why he always looked like a fresh cooked lobster after his bath.

People would always tell me, "I guess you have to be his mom and his dad."

I would answer, "No, I just concentrate on being his dad." I figured that if I tried to be his mom he would grow up with the strangest idea of what women are like.

The most memorable thing about being a single parent is being tired. I would work all day, come home and take care of my child until he went to sleep and then have to do all the work I couldn't do with him awake and under my feet. I actually grew to appreciate Barney videos, not because I thought they were entertaining, but because they would hold his attention long enough for me to cook supper.

The Bible teaches us that God cares about single parents. Time and time again you can read how God has a special place in his heart for widows and orphans. In the Old Testament there were laws that had provisions for the care of single parents and their children. (Then as it is now most single parents were moms). In the New Testament we see that help for those single parent families should come from their church family.

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read 1 Timothy 5:3-8

*Please note that generally in Bible times you became a single parent by being widowed.

• A widow with children (a single parent) should learn to do what first?
• Where is the single parent in need supposed to place their hope?
• Should a single parent live for themselves?

Day 47

 

Someone To Call On

 

Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you.

 

1 Peter 5:7

 

 

When my first wife died an older woman friend of mine told me, "You are going to be a popular man with the ladies." She didn't mean I had suddenly started looking like Brad Pitt; it was that I was a bachelor with a cute little one year old boy. The more noble part of me likes to think that women  became attracted to me because of the tragic story and the adorable baby. The more cynical part of me thinks there were some desperate single moms out there that saw me as an answer to some of their problems. I suppose there were some of both.

 

It had only been a month since my wife had died when the phone started ringing. I was never sure what to think about women calling me. I'm old enough to have heard from my parents that, nice girls don't call boys." I was also young enough and worked with teenagers enough to know that these days nice girls do indeed call boys. But these weren't girls, they were women. They called, short ones, tall ones, skinny ones, not so skinny ones, pretty ones and some who in our politically correct times could only be described as beauty challenged. Some of them I knew fairly well but most of them I barely knew. They all called to, "offer my condolences."

 

There was one in particular that I remember. She was a pretty lady that I had just met. She had a son that was starved for male attention that I had played catch with at a church picnic. She seemed to be nice but I really didn't know her.

 

When she called she said, "If you ever need someone to talk to please give me a call. I'm not a stranger to death, so I know what you are going through. My mother died when I was 12 and then my fiancé died in Vietnam. My sister died a few years later and I had only been married a couple of years when my husband died. Other than my son my dad is all I have left and he is back in Colorado and has cancer. I don't expect him to live but another year at most. So, you can see I really am no stranger to death. If you want to talk just let me know."

 

I was somewhat stunned by this oration but managed to mumble out, "I appreciate the offer but I'm doing okay right now." What I felt like saying was, "Lady, I wouldn't touch you with a 10 foot pole. I want to live!" I wasn't even sure it was safe to have talked to her on the phone.

 

It is nice to have someone you can call on, a friend who will listen and encourage you. As Christians we have such a friend. That friend is Jesus. The Bible tells us we can call on him "because he cares for you." One of the great encouragements of the gospel is that not only is God able to help us, he cares about us and wants to help us. We always have someone to call on.

 

After I didn't respond to any of the women who called and finally met my quota of condolences the phone stopped ringing. At the right time God brought just the right woman into my life. She has been a good mother to my son and a good and loving wife to me. And best of all my relationship with her is not life threatening.

 

Upon Further Review:

 

Read Matthew 11:28-30

 

• Who does Jesus call to himself?
• What does Jesus promise?
• What does it imply to take on a yoke?